Driven Crazy

I am driven crazy by silly little things.  But worst of all,
I drive myself crazy... by overthinking EVERYTHING!
I'm sure I drive others crazy too. 



Knowing on June 12th that I would need surgery to remove the mass from my colon, waiting ten days to learn it is cancerous, and then visiting doctors and having tests (stretched out over a long period of time), has driven me crazy. 
From Horses On A Mission - (link)  I get a bi-monthly e-mail, 'An Extra Flake' (by Maureen Gallatin).  Last week's was titled "Driving Ourselves Crazy."  It was concluded with - "Don't drive yourself crazy by thinking too much, and quit pestering God for a bigger picture. He still has the reins."  The Lord directs our steps, so why try to understand everything along the way? Proverbs 20:24



I like this cartoon because it reminds me that I am not the only one that gets driven crazy.

And I am so thankful that doctor's orders and findings are no longer hand written.  They all dictate their information that is stored electronically nowadays. 


I have a patient portal I can go to, to see results of a check-up or test. 


When I read through my CAT scan results, there was nothing too alarming and I saw why it was calling for the PET scan: 'Examination of the liver reveals indeterminate 1 cm low attenuation inferiorly right lobe.  Small cyst seen left lobe." 
So no worries hopefully, but glad it would be further evaluated.  Obviously the tumor was noted: 'There is an area of thickening poorly defined in the right colon. Several sub centimeter pericolic lymph nodes seen. No overt peroneal nodularity seen.'  I hoped this mass hadn't gotten too far along on growth and become too invasive.

Saturday 7/20 - I was up shortly after 2 am, unable to get back to sleep.  This drives me crazy.  So I got up and tried to get last week's blog finished, but didn't.  I also get a little crazy when I can't get my weekly post finished on time. 

I  took a two hour nap on the porch swing with Stevie and then left for the ranch before 7am to do chores.  I saw this hornet's nest in the tree along the drive, on our neighbor's side.

Once I returned home, I saw these girls napping down back when I came into the sun room to turn on my computer.  It was a cool, overcast day with little showers off and on.  I only lasted a short time at my computer and then took another nap.

I hit the gym for just an aerobic workout, so was only there 90 minutes. 




Patty picked Maggie and I up just after I got home.  I showed her how to feed Amiga the new Osteo-Max medicine and helped out with chores. 

The music at the Grove had been canceled because of rainy weather, so I  tried to finish last week’s blog.  I fought sleep while sitting here at the computer until I gave in and went to bed at 8:30.

Sunday 7/21 - Up a little earlier than usual.  I had several bug bites that were itching and driving me crazy, and where did I get all of these new bites anyway?

Shirley was not feeling well, so we skipped church, giving me extra time to finish last week's blog and start this one.  When passing through the living room (to the kitchen) I noticed two deer eating from the bird feeder.  One had turned to leave by the time I got a photo. 

The second one soon decided to move away also. 

I did a load of laundry, made my 'sack lunch' and left early to hit the ranch before my shift at the pool.

Primarily I went to give Amiga a Previcox, which can't be given with her Osteo-Max.  But while there, I did some trimming along the drive fenceline and removed roots sticking out in the newly dug ditch. 

The pool was not real crowded, and then when the skies got dark and radar showed a storm coming, almost everybody left, except three ladies, two who were fairly inebriated.  I sent this selfie to Courtney to show her what I was up to.  I was soaking wet from closing umbrellas in the downpour.

I got all my cleaning done during the storm, checking on the ladies a couple of times.  And after the storm had passed (45 minutes), I did let them get back in the pool (even though a little thunder had been heard off in the far distance).  We had the agreement that after a quick swim they needed to leave because I was closing early.  It was just after 5:30 when I was finally locking the gate. 


Patty had chores at the ranch (and was going late because of being at the Playhouse for a matinee).  It worked out well for her because the rain had stopped. 


I had asked Patty to send photos of how the barn and ditch looked after the 'gully washer.'




I was not happy to see how much water still came in the barn, although the barn doors had been open during the storm and it was blowing in from that direction. 



Patty also sent this photo of the rain gauge in the raised bed.  We got almost three inches out at the ranch.  It was reported that Dorchester had a little over two inches, but at home, we only had one inch in our gauge. 


I was pleased at how well the drive and ditch handled the heavy rainfall.





Patty sent a bunch of photos.  These three show both ends of the ditch and a middle section. 

Some silt had washed down the ditch, but at least it hadn't gotten up on the drive. 


The upper end of the ditch definitely needs some neatening up. 





Maggie was a bit of a basket case when I had gotten home.  She was home alone during the storm and still shaken up by it. 
I took her on a walk around the block after dinner and then my evening was spent doing my Sunday weekly chores.  Later I prepared questions for my meeting tomorrow, with the surgeon.  I went to bed wondering if I would sleep okay.

Monday 7/22 - It wasn't the longest or best night of sleep I would have liked to have had, but I hoped it was sufficient enough to get me through the day.

I had morning chores and went plenty early.  I first checked the ditch in front of the barn to see if water coming down the drive had run over it.  It did not appear so, which leads me to believe the heavy rain fall blew in, and then ran down the floor.

Britney had asked about me, so I sent this selfie while out dumping manure in the pile behind the dam.  Can you see Wanda in the background on the other side of the pond?  She follows me around while I work.






 

I took this photo when I went up the drive to open the chicken coop.  Little Miss Amiga is hard on fencing when she tries to get the greener grass on the other side. 

I got ready (called to see if the PET scan had been approved yet - nope 😖, showered, ate an early lunch, and packed up) for our trip to Knoxville to meet with Dr. Midis (my surgeon). 

The appointment with Dr. Midis went well.  I was thrilled to hear he can remove the section of colon with the tumor laparoscopically, and immunotherapy will also be very effective if warranted.  However,  I still have to wait on the PET scan before they’ll do the surgery, so there is no surgery date yet.  The surgery will be done regardless of the PET scan results, but helps to know if the lesion on my liver is cancerous before surgery.  Anyway, I'm once again driven crazy by the wait (for approval from insurance). 



Traffic was bad getting out of Knoxville and Joe was driven crazy by slow drivers in the left lane. 
We stopped halfway, in Harriman, to have an early dinner at Gondolier Italian restaurant.  We both had bread sticks, salad, and then the Italian Sampler - with chicken Parmesan, Manicotti, lasagna, and spaghetti.  I could only eat a third of it and still felt like I was going to explode.

We watched a Clint Eastwood documentary before bed.

Tuesday 7/23 - I had totally forgotten it was Britney's birthday until after lunch, so sent her this GIF real quick.

I shut Stevie in the office/cat room while I'm here at my computer every morning and some nights.  This gives her some snuggle time with me.  This morning she chose to go nap in the cat tower cubby.

I was at the ranch a little after 8:30 to give Amiga a Previcox.  Bonnie was there, for the first I've seen since she fell off Cowboy nine weeks ago.  She was doing great.  By the time I was getting in the car to go to work at the pool, I got a text from Abby, that because of the rainy day, the pool would be closed all day. 

Not working just bought me almost five hours of time.  I came home, had a protein snack, and sat here at my computer until I got too sleepy. It drives me crazy when I get so tired.  I proceeded to take a 40 minute nap, and woke feeling somewhat more lively. 

I was off to the gym.  My three hours there were spent with more chat and rest time than usual, intermixed with some hard work and sweating.  I always feel better after a good workout.

I ran to Food City on the way home, getting surgery (colon) prep supplies among other more tasty food items.  Dr. Midis said it wouldn't be as bad as prepping for a colonoscopy.  Just looking at the big bottle of MiraLax I am to mix with Powerade and drink all of it in 2-3 hours, makes me break out in a sweat.

Wednesday 7/24 - Before going out to the ranch, I made three phone calls and was now scheduled for a PET scan tomorrow afternoon.  I was told not to consume any sugar or carbohydrates 24 hours before the scan.  I looked up my options and realized this was going to be tough.

Once again I am driven crazy (actually swearing mad) by Blogger.  It will not let me move the below photo of Amiga up into this space.  So I have added typing (to vent and fill the space).

I met Susan and Bonnie and soon the farrier at the ranch (before 8:30).  After Cowboy got re-shod, I held Zorro for his usual trim.  Amiga was in her stall napping, but by the time I took this photo, she opened her eyes.  Once it was her turn, I had her shoes removed.  I plan to let her go barefoot and just be a 'pasture ornament' and hopefully we can both heal and get better over the next couple of months. 


Patty's last Gladiola, in the raised bed, blooming.



I was waiting to hear from the surgeon's office and finally got the call while I was in the chicken coop.  I will be having surgery Tuesday, July 30.  Yeehaw!  Now to be driven crazy with worries and doing the PET scan prep and then the colon prep on Monday. 





For lunch I had my leftover salad, with sugary dressing already on it, and that would be it for sugar and carbs until dinner time the following day.  😒

After some digesting time and a little nap I put on my new shirt and headed to the gym.  Wednesday is their 'pink shirt' day.  This is Greg, one of the workers who is always smiling, very positive, and a great motivator to us 'gym rats.'  He used to work patient transport at the hospital so has been very helpful preparing me for, explaining, and calming my fears about the different procedures.
I love the saying on the back of the shirt.

The Wellness Center (gym) is owned and run by Covenant Health, which also has several doctor offices (including Dr. Collins - my regular physician, Dr. Davidson, and Dr. Midis)  and hospitals (including Cumberland here in town and Fort Sanders in Knoxville).  So this makes communication among them all, much easier and more efficient. 

I had chicken with a little broccoli and spinach (even though they have a trace of sugar) for dinner, and then craved sweets and carbs the rest of the evening.

Patty sent this (video) of Cowboy and Amiga coming in at dinner time.  Zorro was already ahead of them and Banner was still out in the field.  You can see Amiga is sore on her front left and back right.  She had troubles with these two legs for the farrier, but this is the fastest I have seen her move in a while.

Thursday 7/25 - My Facebook account was hacked this morning, which really drives me crazy, and has driven me crazy before.  With the no carb or sugar diet, I fixed ground beef and eggs for breakfast.

Just after 8am I left for the ranch to give Amiga Previcox.  She had escaped her stall, darting past Nick before he could get the gate closed and she proceeded to run around the barn yard.  Hum, very unusual... was she avoiding medicine or just feeling better? 

A little later, Joe and I fixed the fencing at the upper paddock so the horses could go into the side pasture from the front pasture without having access to all of the clover in the upper paddock.

I thought I'd have to lead the horses through the opening, but when I called Zorro, he trotted right over, with Amiga and then Cowboy close behind.  Banner brought up the rear as usual.  They all slowed to get through the gate and fenced alleyway (video).  At the end of the video you can see how lush the clover is in the paddock.





Joe and I put shavings in the run-in shed and then he brought two scoops of crush run down to the barn. 

I directed the dumping of it and we both shoveled and raked to spread it out.  Hopefully this will take care of the slick mud we get right here after a hard rain. 

 

I went up to the house and did some work in the yard, mostly pulling weeds along the fence line.  By the time I finished, I noticed that the three amigos were working their way back towards the front pasture. 

Meanwhile, Banner was in his own little world, giving Denise a horse to watch. LOL



I didn’t have to rush home for lunch because starting at 10am, I was on a water only diet.

I hit Walmart at 1:00, on my way into town.  Then did my pre-surgery labs and check-in at the hospital here in town, which will send the info to Fort Sanders in Knoxville.  The EKG was no big deal (I was thinking I had to run on a treadmill or something).  The blood draw took two minutes and I was on my way.


I had gotten done at the hospital so quickly, that I ended up at the adjacent building (the imaging center) almost two hours early.  I told them I was just gonna sit and read my book.  Well, they ended up taking me in a half hour early because the patient in front of me was late.  The waiting room was in a building and then we went out the back door to the Mobile PET scanner.
I had done a good job of keeping my blood sugar down. It was at 90 when they tested it.  I was injected with radiation and then had a 45 minute wait until the scan.

This is exactly what the back scanning section of the truck looked like.  The scan was quick and easy.
I had a peanut butter and jelly sandwich and a fruit drink waiting for me in the car, which I consumed on the drive home. 
Life was then back to normal with pet care, salad for dinner, and a 20 minute dog walk.
 

Friday 7/26 - I was up four times during the night, walking off leg cramps.  Changing my diet for the colonoscopy and scan preps seems to really screw up my gut and throw off my electrolytes.  I struggled falling back to sleep each time, and it didn't help that Joe was coughing and snoring occasionally.

Maggie and I startled this doe as we headed out the side door for our morning walk.

I made a quick trip to the ranch to give Amiga a Previcox, then dinked around doing a few other things, and stopped in at the house and got some pictures of the horses and our hydrangeas.  Two of the bushes are blue and one is pink.  Although the flowers on the pink bush (seen in second photo) have a blend of blue/purple/and pink.  The window boxes have not bloomed much all summer.





I made some calls, and answered a plethora of questions concerning my health (for surgery information at Ft. Sanders), and got even more instructions.  All these preps have driven me crazy. 

I had a great workout at the gym, except there was no time for the elliptical because I needed to get to work at the pool.  I don’t usually work Fridays, but Jackie and I had switched because of the tests I had on Thursday.

It was a very slow day at work, which I was thankful for, because I just had my mind elsewhere and wasn’t in the mood for cleaning up after a bunch of people.  And I even got to close the pool a half hour early because it started sprinkling and everybody was gone.  Driving onto Flossmoor, I saw these 'boys' across the street from our house.  The bachelor herd. 

My James Patterson novel has gotten really good, and I’ve made great progress on it with all the waiting time, so I went out on the porch to sit with Stevie and get through several more chapters of the story.

Since Joe was coughing even more, I decided to sleep in a guest bed, not wanting to expose myself to any germs he might have.  So I went up to bed early and finished my book.  This will enable me to have a new one to start with in the hospital.

Make It Known

People who I don’t think know about my diagnosis will ask me how I’m doing and how everything's going?  How am I feeling, etc.  I hate to share with them the truth, because it can be difficult and catch them off guard.  And it kind of squashes the jovial feeling of greetings.  But they asked, and I am fairly open and honest.  So I make it known.  Right now I'm doing great, but I figure once I've had surgery, people are going to notice a difference in me and wonder anyway.  I don't feel I need to go around telling everything to everyone, but I'll share freely with those who show interest. 


God calls us to carry each other’s burdens, but that can't be done if the one who is down trodden doesn't share their struggles with others.

I have been very open and willing to share my diagnosis, not for sympathy, or to gain attention, but for support and understanding. 




Sharing our struggles connects us even more. 
It's too bad we don't have signs stating what we’re dealing with.  If so, wouldn't people be more compassionate?  Take for instance a car with a student driver sign on it.  When you see this, you’re much more patient and understanding of them when they stall out at a stoplight or take forever to make a left turn into traffic.  We all have burdens, some just more visible than others.  Everyone is dealing with some kind of physical, spiritual or mental difficulty; or maybe a little bit of each.  I hope my health issues make me more compassionate towards others who are struggling.

← Giving random complements... 
I like this idea that was posted on Facebook.

We should hesitate to judge others because we do not know what they have been through, are going through, or what they are dealing with.  Love, compassion, and forgiveness will go a lot further than judgment, condoning, and putting down others, even if we just do it in our minds.  Being so nice as to give complements will make a positive impact on someone, and even on ourselves. 

And most importantly, make it known to God - your fears, pains, and need for healing, as well as your thankfulness.

Saturday 7/13 - The buck stops here.  There were   seven of them down back while I sat here sipping tea.  

Many of them had some pretty good antlers growing.

Brooke had shared this photo, taken the afternoon before, when she was at the ranch feeding.  I hoped this mama found a safe place to take her babies.  Our upper pond would be a good spot after today, but how does one make this known to the ducks?

The three fields were ready for baling, with the plan to start at noon. 







I went to the ranch to give Amiga her medicine and realized it was my day to do morning chores.  Oops, I was a little late, but got it all done. And Amiga did much better with eating her medicine. 



As I was turning onto Chestnut Hill to go home, the hay man (with a baler) was turning onto Eli Ford. 

 

 

I hit Food city to grab food and drink for our guests.  Dan and Ava were already at the house, and had made themselves at home, by the time I got there.  (Vale was in Chicago for the weekend.)  Joe had already gone to the ranch, to get equipment out and start going on bringing in hay. 

He had troubles getting the truck started (dead battery) and the large trailer hooked to it.  When Patty got there, she took some photos of Joe bringing in the round bales.  The small trailer (with the rest of last year's hay) was off to the side. 





Courtney arrived shortly after I had gotten home and we had a quick lunch and then headed to the ranch.
Patty, Joe, and three of the helpers (Kevin, Dave, and Callahan) had already started picking up square bales.

Dan dropped Courtney and Ava off at the ranch house while I went down to the shop to help stack square bales.  (I had decided there was plenty of help in the field, and I would hold up better if I stayed in the shade.) 







Looking up towards the house, I could see the first load on its way.  The horses didn't seem to be bothered by the flurry of activity.

Courtney (up at the ranch house) Patty (in the truck and shop) and I, all took photos which show different perspectives. 

This is the 'parade' of equipment that went down the alleyway between the yard and front pasture. 

← Round baler     Square baler ↓

Second load of square bales. ↓
 

Patty's view while driving the truck in Jem's field as the men put square bales on the trailer.  ↓





Courtney was babysitting Ava, and working as hard as any of us. 

Ava enjoyed playing in the kiddie pool.  











Wardrobe malfunction. 



Marshmello break. 

Side pasture and Jem's pasture beyond.

Ava never slowed down, and neither did the guys bringing in the hay.  Heading back for another load of square bales after stacking a load in the shop.  ↓ 

These are photos Patty took of us unloading square bales the second time the trailer was brought down to the shop. 

 

The four guys went out with each load and I stayed back to rake and sweep up loose hay.  Joe went out with the tractor to bring in round bales and I helped direct him with stacking them. 









I took this series of three photos, showing the year's supply of hay stacking up. 

All total, we stored away 225 square bales and ten round bales.  ↓








Nothing feels better than a barn full of hay.  Well, I’m sure the news that someone is now cancer free is an even better feeling.  But I'll take this for now, with the 'cancer free' news to come later.

Joe backing the small trailer (of what's left of last year's hay) into the shop.










Dan had gone up to the house to relieve Courtney of Ava, and the three of them came down in the gator to see what the game plan was now that we were done with the hay and it was only 3:30.  We had such great help, it went much quicker than expected.

Ava wanted a horsey ride, but it was so hot and there just wasn't much time or energy remaining. 

I wanted to take a quick look at our two 'finished' fields and I thought a gator ride would be compromise for Ava not getting a horsey ride.

Dan drove and Ava and I had fun riding along.  There was a little bit of loose hay in a few spots in both fields, but for the most part it had all been raked up and baled. 









We had decided to head home and order out dinner.  The dogs were glad to see us.  Everybody hit the shower and then we ordered from Domino’s getting a variety of different foods, including pizza. Ava ate two full pieces all on her own.

The cats also checked out the action.  Well, Mama Styx stayed hidden most of the time and Monita watched from a safe distance, but Babe (on the rocking horse) was quite curious.  


Ava hadn't had a nap so went to bed earlier than usual and fell right to sleep. 


Courtney and I finished the horse puzzle with her doing the majority of the work and then she needed to head home (just after 9pm) and I went to bed.  I have no idea what Joe and Dan did, other than have a few beers and watch TV.

Sunday 7/14 - Oops, one more baling photo Joe had taken and sent me.  The middle tractor was raking the hay into furrows, the guy on the left was square baling and the one on the right was round baling. 









Ava was up by 6:30 which kind of surprised me, so I didn’t get any blogging done, but that was OK.  I had fun joining her for breakfast. 




I ran out to the Ranch to give Amiga her medicine and the 'boys' took Ava and the dogs to the park by the library building, walking up the hiking trail to get there.  



Ava enjoyed all the playground equipment. 


Eventually, we all headed to Dartmoor Marina where we met Patty for a 10:00 pontoon ride. 



Captain Joe and Dan in the back.



We girls enjoyed the sun out front while watching the scenery and wildlife.

Ava enjoyed looking for fish and other critters.

It was plenty warm, so we were soon to anchor and get in the water to cool off.  We all enjoyed the swim.  Patty took the group photo so wasn't in it.  












Ava really enjoys the water and is quite relaxed and confident in it, and able to 'swim' from person to person with her life vest on. 

 

Soon we were back on board to dry off and enjoy a snack with our drinks. 











We had only rented the boat for an hour, had gotten a late start, and were told we could keep it a little longer since no one else would be needing it.  So we didn't arrive back to the dock until almost 11:30.

Next, we hit the beach. 



Ava was quick to get in the water (videos). 

 

And poor Daniel never got a moment of rest. 

He is such a good father. 














It was nearing 1pm and time to get home for lunch. 




Ava was procrastinating, not wanting to leave and wanted to see the boats. 




So Papaw took her down the dock to say goodbye to the boats while Daniel got everything packed up. 






A gentleman offered to take our photo, so I joined Joe and Ava on the dock.  I'm not sure how he got the light setting to look like this, but it's kind of cool.

Dan wasn’t sure he could get Ava down for a nap at our house so he decided to pack up Ava and Tango and head home.
Joe left for poker.

I didn’t have to work at the pool cause I had worked Friday night, so I sat down to start this blog and next thing you know I was taking a nap on the couch.

After neatening up the house and working on laundry, while visiting Stevie out on the back porch, reading, I got tired again and took another little nap.

I did get three loads of laundry done, but even after two naps, it was early to bed for me.
 

Monday 7/15 - I was out at the ranch to do chores by 7am, and gave Amiga ½ her medicine.  She’s doing great eating it now, so I’m feeling much better about that.  Silly Wanda with cat food dust on her chin.

Once home I had a big protein breakfast and then worked on my blog for quite awhile.  Again I ended up taking over an hour nap on the couch.  This put me behind time getting to the gym, so I didn’t get in a full workout, skipping the elliptical.







Karen was at the house to pick me up when I got home from the gym and we headed back to the ranch so I could show her how to portion the new medicine on Amiga's food.  We just gave her the other half this time.  Again, Amiga ate it all up right away.  I am so happy. 



Walking up the drive to water plants at the house, I saw our 'resident' bunny, in above photo, and took a (video).

The evening was spent going through photographs of Daniel (he had requested some) from ages two to four.  It sure brought back a lot of fond memories.  Joe was such a great dad and we did so many fun things as a family and it’s been a blessing to be able to get together with all my family so often.

It was nearly 10 o’clock by the time I turned the lights out once I finally got in bed.

Tuesday 7/16 - I woke at 1:00, got out of bed at 2:15, and made much better progress on this blog. 
I napped out on the porch with Stevie from 4:30 - 6:30, and enjoyed waking to the sound of birds and rustling leaves.

Courtney took these first two photos on Saturday.  Can you spot Wanda at the wash rack?





I worked at the pool from 9-2 and got a little sleepy a few times.  Then I went straight to the ranch, and changed into work clothes up at the house.  However, instead of working, I took a nap on the couch.  Sheesh.

Thankfully, a phone call woke me in time to meet Susan and Dave down at the barn. 





I showed them how to feed Amiga her medicine.  Then as I was going up the drive to leave, I got out to shoo Banner (who was up at the fence at the corner of the yard and lane) towards the paddock gate. 



Banner joined up with the other three horses and then I got these photos of Susan and Dave driving (pushing/herding) them into the paddock.

I heated up some (low sugar) bake beans for dinner and don't know where the rest of my evening time went.  I have noticed that my abdomen has actually felt a little bit better the last few days and I have been able to eat more.  I also think I have more energy because of the iron pills.  I'll take these improvements.

Wednesday 7/17 - Jean and John's Birthdays' are today.  Susan posted this terrific photo she had taken of the four horses, waiting to go out on the pasture. 

I had a great morning workout at the gym, and miss being able to get there earlier.  I’ve discovered when I go in the afternoon, which I’ve been doing a lot lately, I don’t have near as much energy. 





I ate a quick lunch and then went to the ranch to meet Tyler.  His truck was parked by the garage and he was working on Jem's front entrance by the pond.

I removed Amiga's grazing muzzle and then met with Tyler to review the 'game plan.'  First they would cut down the scraggly pine tree growing so close to the nicer one, and also crowding the ditch area. 






I had showed him where to dump it, and then I got to work moving some gravel near the front of the barn where he would be digging a shallow ditch.  While I worked, Jeff came down to dump the tree load. 

I had wanted to take Amiga for a little ride to see how she was doing. So we headed out under the tower to Hathaway.  There was a nice breeze but the sun was a tad warm out on the road.  











Before getting to Marmaduke, I turned off the road and took Amiga on our woodland trail (video).

She was very willing, but favoring her front left leg worse than usual, so I only rode ten minutes and kept it at a walk.  Here we are stopped to look out at our back pasture, nicely cut with all the hay harvested. 








When I got back to the barn with Amiga, I gave her a Previcox.  I could see that Tyler and Jeff were progressing further down our drive with the ditch work.

I put Amiga out with the boys, who didn't seem bothered by the noisy excavation equipment. 










I took more photos of Tyler and Jeff working.

Once they were finished digging the ditch, Jeff dumped the load of rocky dirt they had removed. 










Now we have a brush pile and a dirt pile.

Then Tyler came down to the barn with the back-hoe to dig a trench in front of it to hopefully 'wick' the water away so it doesn't run through the barn. 









He had started to fill the ditch with rock we have, but I told him Joe could do that, we're trying to save money anywhere possible.

I wasn't sure this was deep enough.  I guess we'll see.  The two workers left and I got started on chores. 










Wanda the wonder cat, is such a silly girl. 

I fed Wanda once finished with the horses and then headed up the drive to care for the chickens.  I hopped out of my car to get a few photos of the lane and ditch. 
Tyler wasn't done yet, but had made nice progress on the ditch and grading the edge of the drive so water will run off of it.

This is looking up the drive towards the house and chicken coop. 






This is looking down towards the barn.  You can see the stump of the pine tree that was cut down. 






Tyler actually had the ditch deeper, but kind of filled it in when he graded the drive.  He planned to dig it back out tomorrow.


It was an unremarkable evening.  Poker Joe was gone and I did household chores and read in bed.

Thursday 7/18 - CAT scan day.  I hadn't eaten since before bed and had to drink 40 ounces of water an hour before my 10:00 appointment.  At least I was allowed to pee. 

I made it through the whole thing.  They had to move the IV to a different blood vessel and put a warming blanket on me because I was shaking, mostly from cold, but maybe from a little anxiety. 

I ate a sack lunch and continued drinking plenty of water as instructed while I did some shopping.  Once home, I took a much needed rest on the porch swing.  I go out there to keep Stevie company.  Mama Styx had followed me, and beat Stevie to my lap.

I was woken up by a call from Dr. Davidson's office.  He had gotten the scan results, and had now ordered a PET scan.  This immediately made me concerned that they found something on the CAT scan.  I kind of panicked and my anxiety meter went up another notch.  I made it known to all my supporters, what the next step was.  So now we wait for insurance to approve me and then set up the appointment and yada yada yada.  I wish I knew how advanced and involved this cancer was.







I went to the Ranch to show Brooke how to give Amiga her medicine, and got a photo of these three while helping get them in off the pasture.

I also got some photos of the finished driveway and ditch job. 



Within a half hour of texting people, I had gotten so much positive feedback.  Three different people told me that this is all part of the diagnostic process and an indication of how thorough Dr. Davidson was being so he can give me the best treatment possible.  The Pet scan will give him a clearer image.  It's what he really wanted from the beginning.  It shows a different type of information concerning the tumor, than the CAT scan.  But this is typical of how insurance works, you have to do one before the other.  Anyway, I felt quite a bit better about it.  I just can’t wait until we know exactly what we’re dealing with and can then start dealing with it.  I am so blessed to have so many who care about me. 




The drive looks great. 














But I'm a little disappointed  in the ditch work. 

These are looking at the ditch from both directions.  I thought it should be a little deeper and feel it could be much neater.  



















But it is definitely an improvement.  I'll hold judgement until after our next 'gully washer.'

I had dinner out with the girls (Judy, Patty, and Shirley). We are all going on a cruise in February together, (and also sister Teresa).  We talked three hours straight without stopping, reminiscing about past cruises, cowgirl times together, and reflecting on so many other things.  We laughed till we cried and had a great time.

I was late getting to bed and dropped off to sleep right away, feeling so blessed.

Friday 7/19 - I worked the morning shift at the pool since I had to switch to get off work yesterday morning for my scan.  It was overcast and cooler, so business was slow.     

A few photos from the ranch since I didn't take any all day.  This Rose of Sharon is so pretty. 









Here is the finished ditch work in front of the barn. 




I was home long enough to change and drink a glass of milk.  Then I spent nearly three hours at the gym getting in a really good workout.  In addition to not having as bad of gut aches, I have put back on two pounds. 






I really needed to work on this blog post to get it finished and posted, but my James Patterson thriller has become very captivating, so I read in bed longer than usual.  I had various cats (except Stevie who is confined to the porch) visit me.  This is Styx. 
I fell asleep knowing I am in good hands with God and loved and supported by so many.